Yes, Leftists, We’re All Going to Die Due to Kennedy’s Departure

Leftists are currently losing their collective minds over the departure of (mostly) conservative Justice Anthony Kennedy. As I was preparing my tank to role down Dallas’s main square in celebration of my soon-to-be unlimited 2nd Amendment rights (I’m going to buy myself an anti-aircraft gun for my Chevy) I noticed that rabid feminist Jessica Valenti was upset over something the Federalist’s Sean Davis had said. “If Roe is overturned,” wailed and gnashed Valenti, ” women will die – but it’s all a joke to men on the right.” If Roe is overturned, women will die – but it’s all a joke to men on the right. pic.twitter.com/fiGXhlQ0cv — Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) June 27, 2018 How could Davis be so myopic? I never considered the fact that Kennedy’s departure would put Roe v. Wade in danger, and the ability for women to kill their babies with little difficulty would be put in danger! That women won’t be able to kill future women will put their lives in danger! There will be dead in the streets instead of just in trash bins! Michael Ian Black, who I’m told is a comedian, had a great solution to at least stave off the death of so many women. Stock up on abortions now. Roe v. Wade is gone. — Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) June 27, 2018 Of course! In order to stave off death, women should go and intentionally have unprotected sex, become pregnant, and go buy abortions in bulk now so they’ll […]

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